Friday, January 21, 2005

I'm good enough, I'm smart enough, and doggone it, people like me

So...I'm about to burst into hysterical tears at work because, once again, I am being overlooked, despite my brilliance. I mean...okay, so my company is currently going through a period of upheaval, but god dammit, I'm just...well, I'm completely drained, to be honest with you. Lookit, I'm not a stupid person. I realize that it doesn't matter what kind of ability you have, it matters what kind of ass you can kiss if you want to get ahead in today's corporate world, but today has been a particularly shitty day.

I think that I've mentioned before that I'm in debt because I bought a house. Yeah, well, the fact that I'm not paying my bills was emphasized this morning when a cop showed up to serve me with papers that a particular lender was suing me for the entire amount of my loan. Needless to say, Puppylicious was not happy with this intrusion, and for that matter, neither was I. I mean, come on people! If you expect me to earn a living in order to pay you off, why do you interrupt me at 8am in the morning and make me late for work, thus jeopardizing my already tenuous career.

Oh, God, and I totally hate the know-it-all in the cube behind me. You know the one; I've talked about her before, the one that thinks she's better than me, but the only differences between us are that she speaks very broken and uncomfortable Spanish, and takes five days to work on a project that would take me 5 minutes to complete.

I totally hate her. I mean, with every fiber in my being. But I'm supposed to go to a birthday dinner to celebrate her turning 30 (yay! one year closer to death), and the thought of it makes my skin crawl. I don't like this person...I don't want to celebrate her birth...her death, yes, if she could die in the fiery flames of hell, yes, that I would celebrate. But this...not so much.

So how can I get out of it without having to deal with any confrontational consequences on Monday? Maybe I should just be honest...well, semi honest. How's this: "I'm sorry, but I can't come to your birthday dinner. I have other plans".

Not to mention: "I hate every fiber of your being you fucking piece of shit demon from hell. May you rot and die in your imagined superiority! I'm so much better than you, I can't believe that no one will recognize this"!

But what do I know? After all, she's not the one facing a lawsuit because she defaulted on a loan. Maybe she is better after all.


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